Less is More: Thoughts on Self-Denial, pt. 1

So much for my first attempt at blogging regularly.  To all you youth ministers out there, a word to the wise: don't start your blog in May, because you will not get to your next post until at least August.

We have had another incredible summer with our youth ministry students, and I am thankful for all of the experiences we had and memories made, but most importantly I am thankful for the growth and change I have seen in these young lives.  As always, I went into the summer enthused about getting out of the daily routine of "off-season" ministry (which is heavy on office study and somewhat lighter on time with students), and I am ending the summer just as enthused about returning to the off-season.  Frankly I'm enthused about just having time to sleep again.

But I'm also excited about jumping back into the world of blogging and sharing those things "gleaned" from life, ministry, faith, & family.  Today's post comes from an email conversation that I have enjoyed recently with one of the students in our youth ministry, Lauren.  She is an incredible young lady with a thirst for God's Word and a bubbly personality...and she is heading off to college this fall.  As with most students preparing for this transition, she is beginning to take a bigger view of her life and ask bigger questions about what God has planned for her.  In that spirit I received the following email earlier this week:

Ok. So. Here's the deal...My question is, at what point can I do what I want to do? Like for example, do I do a job that I enjoy, or a job that is going to put myself completely at the service of others? Are olympians and athletes being selfish by doing what they want to do and are passionate about but not using their time to help others? How much money am I supposed to use to help others? You get what I'm saying? Like at what point is what is mine, mine, and give the rest up? God calls us to give up EVERYTHING. So does that literally mean everything?

Being a Christian is a lot like being a student in a class.  All of us probably have the same questions, but not everyone feels comfortable being the one to ask the tough ones.  We squirm in our seats and are relieved when a much braver fellow student, like Lauren, raises their hand and voices the true concerns that all of us are feeling.  This is one of those concerns. 

I think what Lauren is really asking, and what all of us can relate to, is "How do I know when I've done enough self-denying?"   What does it really look like to give up self?

The issue of self-denial also happens to be the theme for our youth ministry's retreat this fall, and I'm looking forward to the study and conversation that will occur as we prepare for it.  

As a starting point for this series of posts on self-denial, I offer up three cautions that we should keep in mind as we work to define what true, Biblical, Jesus-initiated self-denial looks like:

1)  It's very personal.  One size does not fit all.  What radical self-denial looks like for one person will look different for someone else.  When we venture down the path of determining when a brother or sister is, or is not, "giving enough of themselves" to others, i.e. "you are not denying yourself enough," we get into areas of judgment that are not necessarily ours to make.

2)  We can quickly lapse into legalism by trying to categorize and "rate" what self-denial looks like.  We go from asking "how do I view my monetary blessings?" to grabbing calculators and assigning "generosity" an exact figure, instead of seeing it as a mindset and a lifestyle.

3)  In reference to #2 above, examining questions like these continually lead us back and forth between two realities: our mindset determines our actions, but our actions also reveal/determine our mindset.  In other words, we cannot stop with simply deciding to change our mindset on material possessions- we must have actions to back up that change.  After all, as James says, "show me faith without deeds and I will show you my faith by what I do!"    At the same time, though, we can have the actions right but also not possess the right mindset or "heart condition", which is exactly what Jesus berated the Pharisees for!  

It's important that we remember these potholes as we think about Biblical self-denial.  In our next post, we'll examine several Scriptures that speak to the topic of self-denial and spend some time unpacking what they have to offer.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Thanks, Lauren, for asking the hard questions. The same thoughts often come up in some of the things that we sing. When I sing, "I Surrender All," do I REALLY mean it? Do I REALLY want to surrender everything? When I tell God, "Lord, take control," do I really want Him to take control of everything? I need to learn to mean what I'm singing, or don't sing it at all. Look forward to hearing more on this topic.
August 10, 2012 at 11:44 AM
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